I am calling this segment "Let's talk about something here" to document the many chronologically irrelevent issues that ... well ... need to be talked about. For example, let's talk about something here ...

This is my mother-in-law's crack poppyseed cake.

Every year at Christmas she makes plates and plates and plates of proper German baking. And every Christmas I am too busy trying to make sure no one eats all the kipferl, that I don't bother with the poppyseed cake.

Until this year.

This year the chocolately delight that coats the top of these kitchen creations caught my eye, and I thought to myself "Why haven't I eaten these before?"

And then I ate pretty much every piece of poppyseed cake, from every plate of baking, from every room/freezer/garage in the house.

Do you realize that under that layer of chocolately delight is a layer of what essentially amounts to pure butter?

I want to coat my bedroom floor with an Helga-sized batch of these and then lay face down in the middle of the room while some tall Bavarian in lederhosen rubs my feet with that butter cream filling. I am just saying ...

Suffice it to say that if the Canadian Centre for Ethics in Sport had shown up at my house during the Christmas holidays for doping control, there may have been rather high levels of opiates in my system.