After four training runs this week, we had our race in St. Moritz, and all of the Canadians made their way onto the podium ... even displacing a few Germans on the way, which, trust me, is no small feat. I swear those Deutschen are born wearing spandex, one hand holding onto a sled.

I finished fifth, a pleasant surprise considering I was seventh after the first run. My first run was ... mmm ... decent. All the skidding practice that I worked on the night before payed off, and I made it through the top corners just taking a few small taps on the sidewalls. I was more than a little bummed though to see that my push wasn't where it should have been, and on my second run I was fired up, and I layed it down. Not to toot my own horn (okay, well, I suppose this whole blogging thing is just one long horn blowing session ... ) but my second run was the third fastest time of the heat, with the fastest push.

Okay, now let's get onto way more important issues. Like, seriously, could I get just one picture on the podium where I don't look like a moron?

This was one of the coolest medal ceremonies ever. There is a little bridge acorss to the podium, and they have a huge video screen behind, so that eveyone can see what's going on. It makes you feel somewhat important, if only for your five seconds of fame.

And with this great setup, can we get a nice shot of Michelle, looking like she owns a brush, is allowed to pick out her own clothes and possibly has all her teeth still intact? Of course not.

Look at this great picture of Lanette, beautiful smile, straight up giddy about her trophy purse.

And what do I get?

Let's see ... first we get a nice shot of the Bartleman nose.

Yeah, cause that's what the world needs, more Bartleman nose. You could take a picture of the back of my head and there would still be too much nose in the shot.

Then we get some picture of me looking like I need the short bus to pick me up after school.

I can't even manage to look normal during the anthem. I look like I am going to sneeze, or like I am trying to figure out who farted, or like I am just plain confused about what is going on.

Seriously, I have provided the world with five opportunities to get a decent shot of me on, or even near, the podium this season, and nothing.

It's like a driver's license photo session that lasts for months.